Misc
- Oh, look I have eyes budding potato soup
- Slightly mushed and blemished tomato soup
- Passed their sell-by date mini carrot soup
- Best sandwich? Croque Maman.
- What’s one thing you own that you really should throw out? Hoodie.
- What is the scariest animal? Humans.
- Apples or oranges? Neither, bananas.
- Have you ever asked someone for their autograph? Yes.
- What do you think happens when we die? Nothing.
- Favourite action movie? Alien.
- Favourite smell? Fresh coffee.
- Least favourite smell? Vomit.
- Exercise: worth it? In small doses.
- Flat or sparkling? Sparkling.
- Most used app on your phone? Messages.
- You get one song to listen to for the rest of your life: what is it? You’re joking, right?
- What number am I thinking of? 12.
- Describe the rest of your life in 5 words? Photo clicking coffee drinking wanderer.
- I will *not* increase my intake of vegetables this coming year
- I will *not* be doing more exercise this coming year
- I will *not* lose weight this coming year
- I will *not* take the stairs when there's a perfectly good lift available
- I will *not* start a yoga routine this coming year
- I will *not* finish all the books sat on my coffee table by the end of 2024
- I will *not* endeavour to be on time for anything
- I will *not* show remorse at eating that extra slice of cake
- I will *not* care what people think of me in public
- I will *not* be bullied into doing anything I don't want to do this coming year
So, what kind of soup shall I make for later?
Severe wind warnings in place. Severe snowstorm warnings in place. Severe windchill warning in place …
The weather outside my window is, to say the least, severe. The trees are thrashing their displeasure. Me? I’m on my second cup of coffee of the morning—yeah okay, I know, it’s instant, so sue me already!
And, the answer is ...
Colbert asked the questions and I’m giving the answers.
Now, give us your answers.
The problem with letting the girls swing free all day is nipple burn.
Ladies, you know what I mean.
Week Notes #01/24
It’s funny to say that this week has been both busy and quiet at the same time. We’ve both been busy in that my OH had to finalise a few last minute things for the funeral, so there were any number of phone calls, emails flying back and forth, and bills to settle. But all this activity took place amid a backdrop of subdued quiet, at home.
It’s true that the start of the week saw us at home on New Year’s Day, no one was up for family visits of dinner year. I think we all just wanted to stay home, and not do anything. Especially after spending too much time deciding on flower arrangements, cremation urns, and debating with my mother in law if she really wanted to pay over $700+ for a 40 year lease on a slot in the Chapel of Rest for her husband. It turns out the slot was good for four people’s urns.
So yes, the lease was made and paid for. It all becomes a little macabre.
Wednesday saw us all meet up at one of our more famous mall complexes, here in Quebec City, to buy last minute items to wear. Like me, I had nothing suitable for a funeral. I like loud colours. My mother in law, I was told in no uncertain words, no jeans, no light colours, and when all is said and done. We’re in the middle of winter so I wanted (like many) to be wear appropriate clothes. By the way, it was freezing in the basilica.
Outfits bought, last minute details locked down, Thursday and Friday saw everyone who wasn’t working on clear out duty at the mother in law’s place. I have never seen so much collected paperwork in my life. My father in law was, to be blunt, a hoarder. We spent two days shredding paperwork from the 70s.
I kid you not …
Then, the OH phoned a company that deals with sensitive shredding of paperwork for businesses and, well, we signed a contract for them to come and collect all the boxes, dozens and dozens of them, to sift through and ultimately, shred.
And then, it was Saturday morning and we were getting up at 6:30 am to get ready for a 7:45 pickup to drive out along the Beaupre coast to St. Anne for the funeral. We all gathered at the mother in law’s and, at 9 set off as one in a trail of cars, for the basilica.
From 9:15 onwards it was a blur of meet & greet, the service, prayers and hymns, eulogies and finally, the procession from the basilica to the cemetery and chapel of rest for the final interment. A few private moments reserved for only the close family members to pay their last respects, and then, we were off to defrost and warm up at the restaurant.
Happily there was a lot more laughter than tears, and a more joyous celebration, than sombre. As a last hurrah a few family members rendezvoused at my mother in law’s for an afternoon of stories and reminiscing which I think was the perfect end to a very emotional and stressful day of farewell.
Today is a day, I think, for everyone to catch their breath and catch up on life before we’re all back to normal, and work.
Tomorrow is another day.
Prepping for the funeral
Been a crazy busy morning here, in the Frozen North, with so many last minute things to take care of before tomorrow’s funeral. Me and mine have our outfits (all black) hanging ready with shoes set out by the door. As we’ll be getting up at 6:30 tomorrow in order to leave here by 8am. We have a long drive out along the coast to Beaupre and the Basillica, where the funeral is being held. We have to be there at about 8:45 to receive everyone before the 9am service.
Yes, they like to do things early here.
Then, after the mass in the church, it’s off to the crematoria for the interment, though I’m less sure of what happens there as the Old Man has already been cremated. But, by this time, 2 hours or more? I’m sure we’ll all be starving (especially those who missed breakfast) we’ll all be gathering at a nearby restaurant for brunch, which is booked at 11:30 for two hours.
From there I think it will be close family members gathering at my sister in law’s for maybe a last send off drink and reminiscing through out the afternoon, with guests not attending the service able to visit. At least, that’s the plan.
It’s going to be a very long day tomorrow.
We ended the year with a sad death in the family—my father in law died of cancer Dec 11th—so it’s hard to sit here and be witty or have anything pity to say about the start of a new year and what it might hold other than to say, I want to do more.
I no longer feel like I have time to hang around treading water letting days slip by. My sense of mortality has been shaken. A death has the ability to make you reconsider just how much time we all have left on this little blue marble. Throw in all that’s going on in the world right now, and you realise life is finite.
So, I have one New Year’s resolution this year and that is to be more present in my own life, do more, read more, go out and about more. Take bigger bites of what life has to offer and not shrink back waiting for others or, in fact, myself to decide where I can go, or what I can do. Because, quite simply, life is too short.
Have camera will travel … or is that, have phone will travel?
See you out there.
My 2024 Predictions
It’s that time of year when so many people think about writing blog posts looking back at the year that’s gone, and or writing up their New Year’s Resolutions, most of which no one ever in the history of Mankind has ever kept. At least, not me. So why not do something different?
Today I’m going to write my predictions for 2024. Yes, predictions! It’s easy …
I predict:
Oh, and Happy New Year to you too!
Full of Christmas Cheer
We weren’t going to go out today but over breakfast I had a change of mind and dragged the OH kicking and screaming, okay, sulking, to the Grand Marche for a local food and drink Christmas Faire. They changed their mind when they saw they could eat and drink their way around the concourse sampling a ton of fresh handmade Quebec produce.
No one needed lunch when we got home, and we came back loaded down with lots of yummy things, and feeling in good spirits (literally) given it’s been a tough couple of weeks. Maybe this was just what we needed.
Anyway, we won’t run out of chocolate before the New Year.
M E R R Y 🎄 C H R I S T M A S 🎅 E V E R Y O N E
Two hours of cleaning so the apartment is now ready to receive guest and not embarrasses us with scurrying dust bunnies chasing the spiders across the floor!
It might be damn cold out there at the moment, but the sun’s shining brightly in a clear blue sky, so I did a dreaded shopping run before the weekend rush, to get supplies in. I don’t want to have to go this weekend for anything!
And we’re skipping the mall trip too in favour of downloading gift cards to print out and wrap. Yeah, I know. It’s cheating but, given the circumstances, no one is in the mood to celebrate Christmas this year. We’re all meeting up at my sister in law’s on Sunday for a long brunch and a kind of send off to the father in law. I’m sure there will be plenty to drink!
Salut!
Okay, so let’s try something. As I’m way out of it when it comes to apps and their usage, let’s throw this out there.
What are your two top favourite apps and why?
I’m at home, flying solo today, as the OH is with family at the Funeral Directors sorting out the paperwork for my father in law’s cremation and interment in a Chapel of Rest.
I have to say, on a wild weather day like today, I’m glad I’m at home, doing 5 loads of laundry, and not involved in anymore paperwork. I never thought that trying to bury/cremate the dead would be so lengthy, complicated (unnecessarily so) and accompanied by so much damn paperwork. And don’t get me started on the hidden costs of literally everything.
Certifying a will? A will that was already written and co-signed in the presence of a Notary, and registered still has to be further verified by paying yet another notary to see that there are no other claims on the estate. It’s ridiculous and time consuming.
I don’t know how the OH hasn’t started punching people with the amount of red tape involved. sigh
It’s been a week since my father in law died, and he still hasn’t been laid to rest. It took exactly 4 days to bury my own father after his passing. Four days. I can understand the weather being a factor here, but burial of the living by paperwork is a burden no one should have to go through when grieving.
I’m sure everyone has their own experience of this sad rite of passage. Why can’t they make it easier, not more complicated than it has to be?
After yesterday’s rain and howling winds, it was supposed to be calmer and warmer today. Ha! Someone forgot to check in with Mother Nature, who has other ideas. It’s still gusting somewhere around 40km and yeah, while it’s not raining (yet) it’s still fruitcakingly cold out there. About minus 6 with the windchill.
And what’s worse, all that rain has melted most of the snow, leaving the ground almost bare. Quite the contrast to last week.
Is it time for another coffee? It must be time for another coffee, right?
In Passing, a Few Thoughts ...
Since the last funeral I attended was some years ago (my father’s, nearly 30+ years ago) I’ve forgotten just how tedious and complex arranging a funeral can be. Here that task is made all the more complicated by the bureaucracy and sheer number of people who are involved and secondly, by the weather itself. Namely, winter. It’s a little difficult here, in the throes of winter to simply dig a hole in the ground. It’s usually frozen as hard as iron. Never mind, who wants to stand at a graveside in horizontal blowing snow, when it’s MINUS 30 outside. No one is the answer.
The chosen route is to be cremated, have a church service, and then, have the resulting urn of ashes interred either permanently in a viewing building or rotunda, or temporarily pending spring’s arrival for burial in a plot. If you have a plot that is. Land here, like anywhere I imagine, is at a premium.
Which brings me back to the bureaucracy side of things. First up is the funeral home and the several online forms that need to be filled out, and photos provided, along with a copy of the doctor’s initial dead certificate. The provincial one takes 4-5 weeks to be issued. So, no waiting around for that. Otherwise, no one would be buried.
For a church service, especially when you want to hold it in what is the local parish, namely, the Basilica, there are layers of people who need to be approached and paperwork presented, all of which each need an appointment for. Then if you want a choir to sing at said service and a priest to preside, both need a separate phone call and arrangements made. Flowers? You guessed it. Invites, death notices, printers …
Then there’s the cemetery as well, and whether you pay rental on a spot in the viewing room, and a downpayment for a key to said building. Which can run at $75 for just the key. Family plot? You need a gravedigger or two, a different priest (maybe) and all the while, costs are mounting up.
We think it’s hard in the land of the living to make ends meet these days, try thinking about the cost of your funeral and plan accordingly for those left behind so they won’t have a heart attack at the cost. Buy a life insurance. Even then, that’s a whole other story when it comes time to access said insurance and get a payout.
Some of you, sadly, will have already gone through this, and maybe more than once, and know what I’m talking about. How there are so many things that need to be attended to, sorted through, organised, and settled. It becomes all consuming. Thankfully, for us, we have numbers on our side, and it’s been a divide and conquer approach to getting everything organised.
I don’t doubt that, in the end, we’ll get there and my father in law will be laid to rest and the family able to pay their respects sooner rather than later.
It’s been hard to get my thoughts into order this week, a week that has been longer than it seems and we’re only Thursday. The reason being, my father in law was taken into hospital on Sunday and, as of right now, is being kept in on end of life care at this point.
It’s looking like this may be his last few weeks (or even, days) given the state of his cancer, which has metastasised to, well, everywhere. My partner quite naturally, is back and forth to the hospital while trying to work in between. Every one is stressed to the point of breaking but doing their best to hold it all together.
Somehow everyone is hoping things will improve, while experience of what my own father went through has taught me that’s not possible. Thus, this weekend might be our last with him. I wish it were otherwise, while silently praying he doesn’t suffer longer than he has to.
I was so excited, the postman just dropped off a package for me that had my Pepin books of labels, stickers and tapes for my Hobonichi Techo diary.
I bought the Marine and Flora books, and wow, just wow, they’re gorgeous!
Winter wonderland
We have a winter wonderland scene outside today, after it snowed all night adding almost 3 more inches to what we already had. It’s beautiful. There are still tiny little perfect crystals floating in the air. I love these kinds of days, they’re magical, and you feel like anything is possible … if only you wish hard enough!
So after much debate (all five minutes of it) I’m sticking with what I’ve got so far on the new website redesign here: alexandrawolfe.ca
A big thank you to all of you who offered feedback and suggestions, all duly noted. I think I shall concentrate on 3 sectors: what I read, what I write, and what I photograph.
What this space as they say, there’s more to come.
So, the beef bourguignon is in the oven … it tastes so good … oh, that could be the red wine speaking!